A well-meaning human observer thought he would help the chick so he broke the shell open to liberate the baby bird. Very shortly after breaking the shell open, the baby bird died. Apparently, process of fighting its way out of the shell develops the bird's lungs sufficiently that it will be able to sustain respiration when it finally emerges from the shell. By breaking the encasement open for the chick, the human helper robbed the baby bird of the work which would allow it to live.
During an interview a few months ago on Oprah's "Super Soul Sunday," author and philosopher Sister Joan Chittister described "contemplation" as "seeing the world as God sees it." I am in a period of transition, and sometimes it has felt to me like I am that baby bird, attempting to break free of the shell, or in my case the box, in which I've been trapped.
As the story of the bird breaking free drifted into my awareness today, I thought that God must be watching me struggle to break free, all the while knowing that the strength I gain in the struggle will be what enables me to thrive in whatever comes next.
An Eastern adage, from the I Ching if I remember correctly, advises that when the student is ready, the teacher will appear. My own experience is that when a student is ready, many teachers agree. Everywhere I turn a lesson will be repeated for me until I "get it."
I am certain that it was not a coincidence that I ran into someone yesterday, who is a reader of this blog. As she walked toward me, she said, "No blog posts!" I gave the feeble excuse about my job consuming me that has become old and pathetic even to me.
Then I shared that I had given notice that no later than the end of the summer I was leaving the job with which I've struggled. I don't remember her exact words, but it was something like, "We've all been watching you struggle and wondering why you don't just get out of there." Once again I could imagine myself like that bird, struggling to break free.
As I contemplated the image of the bird struggling to develop its lungs so that it can sustain respiration outside the egg shell, I was able to see my life in three distinct phases. In two, I struggled significantly. In the third, between the periods of struggle, my life flowed like a daily miracle.
I thought about God watching me and wondered what had flipped the switches from struggle to flow and back to struggle again. Yet I saw no sign posts that pointed and said definitively, "This is what changed it," in either direction. However, from the perspective of looking at myself in those three distinct phases, I was struck that during the struggling phases I excelled as using skills I'd developed at doing work I didn't particularly like, but because it was valued by my employers and/or clients, I performed the work for money. It was usually important work that helped people, but it wasn't my work.
In the miracle phase, from early morning until I often fell into bed exhausted from a vigorous evening of dancing, life flowed from my natural gifts and talents. I embraced every moment of life passionately. Again, I performed important work that helped people, but in the miracle phase, it was my work.
While the most popular coach training and certification, both of which I have, requires that coaches work with their clients to set specific, measurable, achievable goals, during the period of my life which flowed easily I allowed my life to be led by intentions, instead of goals. Deep inner knowing guided me on mysterious journeys, which I could not have imagined from my wildest goal-setting mind.
One measure about which I have written in this blog previously is the intention to follow "life." To ask myself, "Does this bring me to life? Does it bring life to me?" If it "flips my switches," then it is almost certainly a path I should follow, and if it doesn't, that also is good data--information that I should walk away from that opportunity.
What I believe to be life's intentions were detailed in my book The Game Called Life. These are intentions that I say are written on the back sides of our hearts and were designed to be our internal compasses:
1. Lessons Learned--Will this help me learn a lesson that my soul needs to learn in this life? Or is it a lesson the world needs me and others to learn at this time to evolve humanity?
2. Develop skills and talents--Am I using the unique skills, talents and gifts that I was given for this journey to help me serve the world?
3. Do work put in front of you—What is the purpose for what you are doing at this moment? How will what you are doing serve to make the world a better place?
When my life was flowing, I didn't live by a goal to be a certain level in the company, revenue level in my business, or make a certain amount of money. I lived by the intentions from The Game that brought me to life. In my current struggled, I've focused too much on being of service (and I am certain that I have been of service,) to the neglect of the lessons I needed to learn and using my real gifts and talents.
In this moment of contemplation, I believe that I finally can see Kay as God sees her. After years of watching my struggle, this morning I am certain that God displays a broad grin, knowing that I have finally developed the strength to sustain me when I break out of my shell. What allows me to thrive is truly being who I know I am in my heart.
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