They tell me that many kids go through growth spurts and shoot up a few inches in just two or three months. Actually, I remember seeing that in one of my nephews over a summer. Me? I was the tallest kid in my class until fifth grade; then I stopped growing...completely. At least physically, that it. In adulthood, I am the size of a tall fifth grade, which is to say a pretty short grown up.
We grow in different ways, though, and in some ways I've never stopped growing. I like to believe that emotionally and spiritually I continue to grow. There have been years when it felt like I'd have a major Aha! moment at least every week. I've been in a growth dry spell for a while. You might say I've been stuck.
For several months, I've been feeling like something was coming. On November 2 last year, I wrote about "feeling pregnant," about to give birth to something. I've kept feeling that something positive was about to come my way over the months. Waiting...waiting...but nothing yet.
Over the last two weeks I've started into a growth spurt. (I'd love to be taller, but I think I will have to be happy with spiritual growth.) As I've stepped out in new ways, the Universe has been very affirming. I got into the class I'd been on a waiting list for, and it ends up that it is going to approach leadership from the perspective of personal growth, something I wrote about in Leading from the Heart and The Alchemy of Fear.
As I've done pre-work assessments, I've realized how I've shrunk personally over the five years I've been in my current job; I've significantly lost confidence in myself. Dumbing down on a daily basis has really undermined not only my potential, but also how I show up each day. As I've written over the last few days, discovering that I don't advocate for myself and that I have boundary issues has been a major breakthrough as well. A continuing education class for certified coaches also helped me rediscover aspects that I'd forgotten were part of me.
I've climbed out of the rut, and I am back in the growth groove. YEAH!!!!!!!!!
Tomorrow I am taking an all-day class that I also expect to be revealing, and then the next five days, I'll be in the personal growth class. I am not only in a new groove, but odds are on that I am about to go from zero to sixty very quickly.
I love to grow. I love to discover new things about myself. For a long time, I've thought that our personal growth follows the cycle of nature. In the fall seeds of who we might become drop, rest in the soil, and in spring they sprout. By this time of the year, it is harvest, and we are ready to drop seeds for another cycle of growth.
I usually recognize the beginning of the cycle around the Jewish New Year, which is coming in about three weeks. Although I am not Jewish, over those holidays I usually take a few days to sit and reflect about the year past, what seeds have sprouted and matured, and what seeds I want to plant for the year ahead.
It was at that time last year, that I committed to writing more, and I have written regularly in this blog since that time. I have also written several chapters of my memoir, and I am very, very close (I hope) to having The Game Called Life on Amazon. There were other things that I wanted to bring into my life--more of the work I used to love doing, including coaching, and a new job with better pay and more importantly, a more respectful work environment. Some of those things have happened, and seeds have been planted for others. I'd also knew I wanted a personal relationship.
The truth about some of those things which haven't happened yet is that I haven't been ready. In synch with the cycle of nature, I believe this growth spurt is what I've needed to get me ready. There's an expression: "When the student is ready, the teacher will appear." As nature has approached the harvest, this student has gotten more and more ready, and suddenly teachers have appeared from every direction.
The nature of spiritual growth spurts is that we can't really know from this side what things will look like on the other, but what we can be assured is that a whole new world of possibilities will await us.
What it will look like, I cannot know now, but I am confident that a rich harvest awaits everywhere in my life that I've planted seeds.
Showing posts with label cycle of life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label cycle of life. Show all posts
Saturday, September 6, 2014
Wednesday, November 6, 2013
Going to school
My life has seemed to go in cycles. For a few years life flows swimmingly. Money, relationships, health, and career all work well. Then, for no apparent reason, one day it shifts, and life can be very difficult for the next few. While I certainly think the easy times are much more fun, in truth, I am sure that the difficult ones are more important to the evolution of my soul.
I think of the difficult times as when we are in "spiritual school." It is easy to have faith when everything is easy. I have learned the most about faith when it is tested. Like in the life of the Biblical Job, if we are able to remember that we are on a spiritual journey, we come out the other side stronger and closer to whatever we consider the divine. When things really fall apart, we are going to spiritual graduate school.
When I was publishing a book each year, writing several newspaper columns, consulting globally, and delivering a reasonable number of keynote addresses, I had lots of people around me who loved me. Then the economy went bust...and my business with it. Suddenly, most of my "friends" evaporated. I found out who my true friends were. I would never have learned what makes a real friend without those times.
Similarly, I won't ever really learn about forgiveness and gratitude until I need to forgive someone for a particularly wicked deed and then take it one step further to expressing gratitude for the deed. Twenty years ago a friend and I would talk about "being in lesson" at moments like that. We would know that there was a spiritual purpose for our challenging times. The more challenging the times, the more we were sure we were "in lesson."
School goes in other cycles too. A different friend and I were talking over dinner Sunday about the same lessons that seem to keep showing up in our lives every few years. In my belief system those repeating lessons are ones that our souls signed up to master. But, with each cycle, we learn something different.
I am a bit reluctant to announce at this early stage, but I feel a difficult cycle is approaching an end. You may recall that a few days ago, I wrote about feeling as if I were pregnant (11/2/12.) I've been restless and keep feeling like I have been about to deliver something. Today, I think my "baby" is an easier stage of life. In several arenas in life, I feel little breakthroughs, harbingers of better times. I feel as if it might almost be safe to relax. Ah!
While I look forward to easier times, I am cognizant of being truly grateful for the years I've been "in spiritual school," maybe this time for a spiritual post-doc.
I think of the difficult times as when we are in "spiritual school." It is easy to have faith when everything is easy. I have learned the most about faith when it is tested. Like in the life of the Biblical Job, if we are able to remember that we are on a spiritual journey, we come out the other side stronger and closer to whatever we consider the divine. When things really fall apart, we are going to spiritual graduate school.
When I was publishing a book each year, writing several newspaper columns, consulting globally, and delivering a reasonable number of keynote addresses, I had lots of people around me who loved me. Then the economy went bust...and my business with it. Suddenly, most of my "friends" evaporated. I found out who my true friends were. I would never have learned what makes a real friend without those times.
Similarly, I won't ever really learn about forgiveness and gratitude until I need to forgive someone for a particularly wicked deed and then take it one step further to expressing gratitude for the deed. Twenty years ago a friend and I would talk about "being in lesson" at moments like that. We would know that there was a spiritual purpose for our challenging times. The more challenging the times, the more we were sure we were "in lesson."
School goes in other cycles too. A different friend and I were talking over dinner Sunday about the same lessons that seem to keep showing up in our lives every few years. In my belief system those repeating lessons are ones that our souls signed up to master. But, with each cycle, we learn something different.
I am a bit reluctant to announce at this early stage, but I feel a difficult cycle is approaching an end. You may recall that a few days ago, I wrote about feeling as if I were pregnant (11/2/12.) I've been restless and keep feeling like I have been about to deliver something. Today, I think my "baby" is an easier stage of life. In several arenas in life, I feel little breakthroughs, harbingers of better times. I feel as if it might almost be safe to relax. Ah!
While I look forward to easier times, I am cognizant of being truly grateful for the years I've been "in spiritual school," maybe this time for a spiritual post-doc.
Saturday, October 26, 2013
Seeds of Faith
This is my first full year in my apartment, and I am still planting my balcony garden. Thursday a box full of plants and bulbs was waiting for me when I got home. For me there is something therapeutic about getting my fingers in the soil, so when I embarked on the chore of planting, I did so with much joy.
Fall is a time when I become most consciously aware of faith. As I put out the plants that will grace my home next spring, I do so with a great deal of faith. I trust that if I do my part--plant them right, fertilize, and then water them regularly--they will do their part.
The magic isn't limited to my balcony. In the park behind my home, seeds are or have been dropped and are working their way into the ground to grow roots. Fruits and vegetables left too long in the field have broken open and dispersed their seeds. Wild flowers have gone to seed. The wind has scattered their seeds as well. In something of a mystery, during the winter when the elements seem most inhospitable to fostering life, a magical process of starting life is going on.
This mysterious cycle of life occurs so regularly that it is easy to lose touch with the wonder of what is occurring. In many ways, what occurs in our own spiritual development parallels what happens in nature. Each day as I attempt to grow more whole, whether it be in how I eat or exercise or in my focus on creating heart connections with the clerks in the grocery store.
I take actions each day, not because I expect something will miraculously change in an instant. I take actions in alignment with my intentions for who I am becoming because I have faith that if I do those actions to which I've committed every day, then a few months down the road in what seems like an overnight success, the seeds I've been planting will spring forth in a new me.
Spiritual growth, like planting my garden, is an act of faith. If I act consistently over time, I will grow into a new person, as surely as the tulip bulbs I planted yesterday will blossom in shades of purple and pink. I have faith that I will grow into more wholeness, and by so doing, I will plant seeds for a better world.
Fall is a time when I become most consciously aware of faith. As I put out the plants that will grace my home next spring, I do so with a great deal of faith. I trust that if I do my part--plant them right, fertilize, and then water them regularly--they will do their part.
The magic isn't limited to my balcony. In the park behind my home, seeds are or have been dropped and are working their way into the ground to grow roots. Fruits and vegetables left too long in the field have broken open and dispersed their seeds. Wild flowers have gone to seed. The wind has scattered their seeds as well. In something of a mystery, during the winter when the elements seem most inhospitable to fostering life, a magical process of starting life is going on.
This mysterious cycle of life occurs so regularly that it is easy to lose touch with the wonder of what is occurring. In many ways, what occurs in our own spiritual development parallels what happens in nature. Each day as I attempt to grow more whole, whether it be in how I eat or exercise or in my focus on creating heart connections with the clerks in the grocery store.
I take actions each day, not because I expect something will miraculously change in an instant. I take actions in alignment with my intentions for who I am becoming because I have faith that if I do those actions to which I've committed every day, then a few months down the road in what seems like an overnight success, the seeds I've been planting will spring forth in a new me.
Spiritual growth, like planting my garden, is an act of faith. If I act consistently over time, I will grow into a new person, as surely as the tulip bulbs I planted yesterday will blossom in shades of purple and pink. I have faith that I will grow into more wholeness, and by so doing, I will plant seeds for a better world.
Monday, September 23, 2013
The cycle of nature begins again
The first full day of fall hit Washington with a very chilly morning and a late afternoon sun that bathed me with its warmth as I left the office at the end of the day. I just stood and drank in its wonder. As just a few leaves drifted gently to the ground, I was reminded that this is the beginning of the year. Seeds fall, nestled into the soft ground and germinate for the next season...just like me.
While some make resolutions in January, for me the cycle begins with the transition of season into the fall. As this transition began to dawn upon me this weekend, I was drawn to commit to who I am...who I have always been...a writer. And, I've sacrificed the writer inside me over the last few years on the altar of earning a living. I've been longing for the integrity of putting words to the page, so even if no one reads this, I become more whole by doing it.
As I was halfway through writing my first book Leading from the Heart, I can remember thinking that I didn't care if anyone ever read it, I was learning so much from writing it that was all that mattered. (Thank you for all who did read it. ) What I know in my heart is that if I do nothing else, I must find time for writing.
A few years ago I had an astounding meditation one day when just flowing from me were the words of why we are here in this world.
Writing is clearly a gift that it is time for me to develop again. Today, I write for the second day in a row. I am planting seeds which will sprout in the spring and yield fruit in the summer. Today, I begin the cycle of nature...again.
While some make resolutions in January, for me the cycle begins with the transition of season into the fall. As this transition began to dawn upon me this weekend, I was drawn to commit to who I am...who I have always been...a writer. And, I've sacrificed the writer inside me over the last few years on the altar of earning a living. I've been longing for the integrity of putting words to the page, so even if no one reads this, I become more whole by doing it.
As I was halfway through writing my first book Leading from the Heart, I can remember thinking that I didn't care if anyone ever read it, I was learning so much from writing it that was all that mattered. (Thank you for all who did read it. ) What I know in my heart is that if I do nothing else, I must find time for writing.
A few years ago I had an astounding meditation one day when just flowing from me were the words of why we are here in this world.
- We came to deliver a service that is needed at this point in time.
- We have certain lessons our soul needs to learn.
- We are here to develop our unique gifts and talents.
Writing is clearly a gift that it is time for me to develop again. Today, I write for the second day in a row. I am planting seeds which will sprout in the spring and yield fruit in the summer. Today, I begin the cycle of nature...again.
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