I have a few passions in life, and one of them is flower gardening--very precisely flower gardening.  I have no interest in growing things to eat unless they happen to be flowering herbs that I can cook with (another passion,) and to give me a house plant is a death sentence to the poor plant.  But, flowers are a whole different thing for me. 

Why, you may ask, am I talking about growing flowers when the wind-chill temperature tonight is predicted to be zero?  Well, I ordered some hard-to-find shade plants on the internet.  That apparent set loose a frenzy of address-sharing, which has resulted in a treasure trove of gardening catalogs...every day.  Today's bounty was particularly generous.  I am not sure if it is a blessing or curse, but it always seems that the catalogs are most plentiful in the worst of winter to tease or entice me into thinking about spring.  I am going to take it as a blessing.

Since I live in an apartment, I have a limited amount of space, and I am probably already over-planted.  But just looking at the catalogs made me start thinking about the promise of spring. There are spring flowers lurking below the soil, waiting for the first warm breezes and longer days to pop their heads through the soil...right on my balcony...now.

Long before I began a conscious spiritual journey, and even longer before I began meditating, getting my fingers in the soil was my meditation.  When I was married, my husband used to say he could watch me go into a zone that was like watching tai-chi as soon as I got near my plants.  I am not sure what there is about flowers, but I know I am not alone in this zen-like experience of gardening.  It has been too long since I've had my fingers in the soil...and judging from the temperatures right now, it will be longer still.

There is a magic that happens as the first tender green pops through the soil in late February or early March.  The flowers wait patiently to break through the earth.  I wonder if I am not like those plants, I've been patiently waiting to grow to the next stage.  I've been saying this season's affirmations since mid-September, and waiting...waiting for the thoughts to become reality.  In the past, there was suddenly a day when I realized I wasn't just saying, "I am love," but I actually felt it in my bones.  Just like the plants waiting to break through the soil, I think my evolution is kindled in my heart ready to emerge anew.  I am ready.  I am ready to see the new me emerge, along with the first flowers of spring.