Surrendering the Past

 A couple weeks ago I wrote about "being present"--really being awake in our lives and fully conscious of our spiritual growth opportunities.  Ever since the other "being present" has been gnawing at me: being in the present.    Being in the present means not being in the past and not being in the future, but being in the moment--in present time.

One of the affirmations I'm working this six-month cycle is "I surrender the past, leaving only the present."  Surrender is an interesting word.  Surrender implies that we are willing to fight till we have nothing left to prevent giving something up.  For many, if not most, of us, we go to the mat to hang on to what has been.  Hanging onto the past robs us of the present, and the present is the only place that we can make change in our lives.  Hanging onto the past prevents us from moving forward.

Spiritual discipline is the very act of choosing to be present...again, and again, and again.  Spiritual discipline--being the student--means choosing to try something that is hard that we've tried before in the past and maybe failed at once or many times.  But today, we can start new.  Today we have a clean slate.  Today is the day that we can rewrite our stories to be the person that we are becoming.

In The Alchemy of Fear I wrote that our "has been" engage in all out battle with  our "becoming."  As who we are becoming gains strength, our "has been" fights to retain who we have been in the past. The present is uncharted territory.  In the present we can start afresh each day.  Our "becoming" in the present holds out the lure of success.  Only if we lose sight of what we are becoming can we slip backwards into the past. 

I said yesterday that I finally had recaptured the vision of the author, spiritual guide/coach, and professional speaker that I was for so many years.  That is what I am "becoming" again.  Even though that was a life I had before, I know it will be different this time--even better than I can imagine.  I eagerly surrender who I have been  to embrace who I AM "becoming" in the present.